the only thing worse
than bad memories
is no memories at all..
[dismemberment plan]
12.27.2006
If You Guys Have Time...
Please help me think positive thoughts!!!
My brother just told me that former president Gerald Ford died tonight.
Though I am certainly saddened by his death -- I am in an incredible state of distress for another reason.
I have two turtles at my dorm in New York right now while I'm here in New Jersey for the holidays. I left them with a bunch of feeder fish to eat while I'm gone.
It's been several days since I left them, and I was confident that they would make it through. I cleaned their tank thoroughly before I left, made sure the filter was connected, left a bunch of fish for them to eat.
But the thing is... my baby turtle, the smaller, shy one -- His name is Gerald Ford.
(Gerald's brother, Hans.)
And if this isn't foreshadowing, I don't know what the fuck is.
I have to go back to the city and get my turtle babies!!! I have this terrible feeling in the pit of my stomach about little Gerald and Hans. I am glad, however, that my other turtle isn't named James Brown -- that would be a little too freaky for me to handle.
Please, if you have a moment, try to channel some positive energy to two turtles in Manhattan. I do think I left them in good shape, with plenty of resources to sustain them until my return, but I'm going back to the city as soon as humanly possible to bring them back with me, even if it angers my dad (who previously dumped my three then-adolescent turtles into a river while I was away at school).
I'll leave you with a Simpsons quote, from the episode that concludes with Gerald Ford moving in next door.
Gerald Ford: Say, Homer, do you like football? Homer: Do I ever! Gerald Ford: Do you like nachos? Homer: Yes, Mr. Ford. Gerald Ford: Well, why don't you come over and watch the game and we'll have nachos, and then some beer. (Homer and Ford cross the street together.) Homer: Jerry, I think you and I are going to get along just--- (They both trip in Ford's driveway) Homer & Ford: D'oh!
[Peek-a-Foo]
